Inequality

“Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus”

This particular notion has been replicated, reproduced and (mis)interpreted into SO MANY absurd, beautiful, thought provoking, and more often than not, scandalous ways. Before you reach a point where you /*physically */ cannot roll your eyes back any further, thinking that this is yet another cleverly disguised post about sexism or feminism or anything in that direction, please, you are safe. This is just my attempt to make sense of the extent of chaos this idea has brought along with its wake, in our lives.

No. Men and women are not equal. No. Neither of them is better. No. Neither of them is worse.

I don’t know why the fact that we belong to the same species has to imply that we must be equated. I mean who even brought that up? This is so hilarious on so many levels. (To the feminists who are reading this, please, I am in complete awe of everything that has happened in the female empowerment part of the history, spanning across decades and beyond boundaries. I am so glad that compared to say, the last century, women have overall improved in almost all walks of life. I truly am.) Man and Woman are separate entities, and we are as different as two abstract entities can be. Though the latter has unquestionably been ‘unfairly’ treated over time, I use the word ‘unfairly’ ONLY in absolute terms, with respect to women. Not with respect to men. A woman goes to work, and is paid only 100 rupees, when the salary is 200 rupees. This is unfair because she deserves 200. Where, from where in this universe and all the parallel universes put together did man enter this equation? This shall remain a mystery. A smart woman feels she can help her family function better, and also spend her time more productively, if she goes to a job. Again, how does the fact that a man in her position gets to work but she can’t relevant here? Why the comparison?

To make things more clear, I study in a place where girls are restricted to go out of campus except when they go home, and are restricted to even go outside the hostel after 6 PM. This has made me angry so many times, but, BUT, all that anger was because I knew that I deserved more freedom, and jailing me is not going to protect me from life and its many dark, twisted games in any way. NOT because boys don’t have the same restrictions as us. Even though I fall prey to comparisons and end up whining around saying “If I was a boy, (insert anything relevant) “, or “how come only they get to go out?” after a few minutes, it always dawns on me that I was wrong to compare.

I must confess this particular quote has made the most sense ever to me: “Women are created to do things a man cannot”. However I’ve modified it to “Women and men have a common subset of things which they go about pursuing with all zest and zeal. However, outside this subset, each has a set of things that the other cannot do. They just cannot, and one gender trying to pursue this special set of the other is the root cause of ALL the problems that has happened and is happening and is about to happen in the world.” We have all fallen into a stampede that is running all around us in blind and destructive ways, in pursuit of equality. A very few of us remain stable, in the pursuit of the actual truth, coexistence. In my view, that will just make everyone’s lives so much better, accepting that men and women are different, and learning to make things work with the differences, instead of eliminating them.

Again, I do not intend any offence to either gender by saying this. I completely agree that women have countless problems and have to face horrible situations that men don’t, and day by day things are getting worse for us out there, and a good deal of this problems are indeed caused by men. Some men, not all. But there are definitely ‘some’ women who reciprocate this to men, and sometimes on women too. And there are things that men must face that women cannot even dream of facing. So the next time, stop with “Why can’t I do this?” instead of “Why can’t I do this like him/like her?”

Peace. Thank you.